Kristine
In the realm of TV advertisement, there’s one type of commercial that always goes above and beyond: perfume commercials. They’re gorgeous, bizarre, nonsensical, and completely uninformative. Trying to market a scent to an audience unable to smell it or even know what it might smell like is probably a thankless and difficult endeavor. With bizarre perfume names such as A Thousand Wishes, Happy, and Knowing, just to name a few, it’s no wonder why these ads are so abstract and artistic.
But the weird scent names don’t end with perfumes. All kinds of products, from makeup to laundry detergent, have creative, but utterly worthless descriptions. Just for fun, see if you can guess the fragrance from the mysterious names alone:
1. Swagger
This cringeworthy fragrance from Old Spice comes in an array of body and hair care products, including shampoo, body wash, and deodorant. The scent description is equally hilarious, with quotes like: “Strengthen your swagger with the man-nificent smells of lime and cedarwood,” and “All the essentials you need for unstoppable swag from head to toe.” If you need more swag in your life, Old Spice has you covered!
2. Friday Night Football
This name can easily be interpreted in several different ways. For some people, a Friday night football game might remind them of autumn bonfires, hot chocolate, and freshly cut grass. Others might be reminded of sweat, blood, and those strange odors that emanate from strangers sitting beside them in the bleachers. According to candle company Homesick, their Friday Night Football candle has top notes of lemon, leather, and grass, mid notes of popcorn and cedarwood, and base notes of musk, dirt, and steel. If you’re into that.
3. The Perfect Man
Wholesale candle and soap supplier Nature’s Garden wanted to create a fragrance oil that represents all of the unique traits that “a perfect man” should have. So, naturally, as you may have guessed, The Perfect Man oil contains a laundry list of various scents that don’t all complement each other. Here are the thirteen fragrances mixed into this overwhelming fragrance cocktail:
- Top notes of Japanese grapefruit, bergamot, and lemon.
- Mid notes of peppercorn, ginger, jasmine, aquatic marine notes, and a hint of peppermint.
- Base notes of natural patchouli, cedar, vetiver, labdanum, and frankincense.
4. Funeral Home
While this scent sounds like it would be really depressing, it is actually just full of some classic floral notes. Available as a perfume, cologne, lotion, and diffuser, Funeral Home is described as “a blend of classic white flowers including lilies, carnations, gladiolus, chrysanthemums with stems and leaves, with a hint of mahogany and oriental carpet.”
If you’re wondering how this simple floral scent got such a morbid name, the founder of Demeter Fragrance Library allegedly didn’t like the smell of white flowers very much. When asked to give his opinion on this particular blend, he said, “It smells like my Grandfather’s funeral… call it Funeral Home!”
5. Tank Battle
“A blast of sweet bubblegum mingles with sharp metallic notes and a transgressive hit of spray paint to create a wearable art piece for fearless innovators,” boasts Lush Cosmetics. Although the exact fragrances used in the Tank Battle perfume aren’t listed by the company, one reviewer said it smelled like “cotton candy in the woods.” While this might not be the right scent for everyone, this is a great option for anyone looking for something earthy, but still sweet and feminine.
So, what exactly is the point of these strange scent names? Is it just a way for retailers to keep us in the store longer because we have to smell every single product (looking at you, Bath and Body Works) before making a decision? Could a funny or confusing name make a product stand out to customers more than “traditional” fragrances?
Whatever the case may be, I personally hope this trend will remain popular for years to come, if only to ensure that the avant-garde nature of perfume commercials never changes. Hopefully, that makes… scents.
